Driving lesson

I recently gave a friend’s daughter a 2-hour driving lesson. It was in the middle of a stressful couple of weeks (a hospitalization, our air conditioner broke, our car’s gear shift broke, I had a fall at PT, a recent dental filling fell out, etc.), and I found it strange that the driving lesson felt so calm.

I know some of the reasons that the lesson did not add to my overall stress level. This wasn’t my own child, there wasn’t a deadline, the car is 20 years old and has no residual value, and this wasn’t her first or last driving lesson. But this experience was actively calming in a way that I didn’t expect.

Focus played a role. I was entirely present in the moment, paying close attention to the driver, the car, the immediate environment, and nothing else. That sort of focused attention is often hard to achieve for very long before the next demand comes from my child or my work or the world at large. But this was two hours where other concerns were gone.

Simplicity played a role. The controls are two pedals and a steering wheel. Make the car go, make the car stop. Learn to control where the car goes, and avoid non-moving objects. If another car shows up, stop out of the way until it’s not near you any longer. Driving around a half-empty parking lot with very light traffic is drastically simpler than the usual Boston driving experience where you are surrounded by moving maniacs who are allergic to the rules of the road.

Feeling useful played a role. I like to be of service, and this was a great opportunity to help someone out. Completing a task played a role, and a task that is simply “teach for an hour or two” is by definition complete at the end of that time. That is quite different from my usual tasks that involve solving problems with myriad complications and no clear timeframe. We got up through successfully parallel parking behind an actual car, so there was also a clear sense of accomplishment.

And my student was an excellent student. She wanted to be there, she wanted to learn, she didn’t want to show off, she listened to instructions, and she embraced practicing. I rarely get that with my 7-year-old for 10 minutes, let alone 2 hours.